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| Aug 11, 2005 6:40 am |
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re: re: re: Laughter in Networking? |
Marilyn Jenett
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I feel prompted to jump in the water here...
Please forgive the fact that I never read this thread before because I just don't find this name game funny - silly, but not funny (and I am not known for a lack of humor). I read the subject line some time ago and that was enough.
But I just saw all this new activity and asked myself, "What the heck are they doing in there?" and couldn't resist.
I see. You apple fanny cootie characters have some crusty conversation going on here and it's stimulating my dorkey poopsie brain. (Help! Let me outta here!).
That's better...
All due respect to Brian Tracy, I just have to disagree with this. First of all, we're not talking the man on the street here. We're talking about BUSINESSmen. And I believe that any businessman who is reasonably perceptive (which he should be if he's in business) can tell if a woman is coming on to him with a smile or not. And if he is a businessman, I would think that his ego wouldn't be distorting his ability to conduct business (of course none of this is absolute depending on hormone levels).
Women don't just smile with their mouths. They smile with their eyes. And THAT look can come across in the eyes. But a friendly, warm smile upon meeting a business contact or client? I believe that could only create a nice bond between two people and be the precursor to a good business meeting/relationship.
Women in this day and age are serious about their businesses and careers. It would be rare for one to enter a business meeting with the intention of "hitting" on a contact or client. So I think it is unrealistic to think that men would be on the lookout for this or expecting it - if they were indeed businessmen. And if there was a situation where the man might misread for some reason - then surely by the time the women begins the conversation and displays her knowledge and/or intelligence, he will understand. In fact, that might impress him more to find a warm, feminine personality who really knows her business stuff. She's not attempting to be an equal man - she's a businesswoman - not a girdle tushed floosie. Of course there may be a couple of jerks out there who have their own plans for giving the saleswoman the account - but they are outside of the scope of this conversation.
Anyway, these are just my thoughts. Perhaps Brian Tracy's statement goes back a bit in time - was it recent or a bit "archaic"? He's been around for ages.
I am reminded of a situation I experienced some years back. I had a young attorney doing some business for me and we got involved in a project together. He invited me to a meeting at his office to meet some principles of the project - men. Steven and I became friends and could speak honestly to each other. He later gave me what he said was an incredible compliment - something I was not at all aware of.
He said that when I walked into the room and when I spoke, I commanded everyone's attention (all men). Why? He said that I wasn't like most women who subtly use their feminine wiles when meeting with men. He said I did not come across as masculine in any way nor was I overly feminine. He told me they were all aware that they were in the presence of a BUSINESS PERSON who knew her stuff. And although it was awhile back, I guarantee you that when I walked into that room I smiled as I shook each man's hand.
I am not sharing this account to brag in any way - I honestly was not aware of how I was perceived until he told me. I am reminded of this because I know that when I entered that meeting, I had one thing on my mind - that meeting. And that's what I projected. I am equally certain that if I entered a room to meet a man and lusted after him and wanted him to know it, I could project that too :-) But I doubt seriously if that is what is happening for the most part in today's business world.
And besides...in the movies, don't the men ALWAYS buy from those saleswomen who smile - you know - smile (wink)?
I vote for men AND women to keep smiling. Just no heavy breathing.
Marilyn
Private Reply to Marilyn Jenett (new win) |
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