Sue T.
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I've posted on this matter ... even ate a little crow. If an individual vents about something, whether it be professional etiquette or personal preferences in life. At some point and time people have reactions, and need to vent. To misinterpret this as anger due to our own perceptions, I believe is not a fair assessment of any given situation.
After all ... is it true? Perhaps at the time, a person can be angry over something and rightfully so. So they vent and perhaps it is misinterpreted by others as a long standing pattern of behavior or something else.
When I originally read the posts "after" the original one, I thought perhaps he was angry. Then I read other posts regarding the topic without going back to the beginning and was led by the thoughts of the group. Not the best thing to do because, none of the "perceptions" were factual. My perception initially was that if I'm to the point where I'd say that someone is an idiot, I'm angry. This does not mean that the situation was not taken care of properly, or in a professional manner. I made an assumption based on my own "personal" reactions to things. I have been in a position at times through out life, to handle something that struck a nerve with me, handle it professionally and then vent. It's human nature.
I am not sure how courage relates to this topic. Would you help me to understand how one relates to the other?
Forgiveness is a wonderfull thing. It releases the person who holds a grudge or has a problem with something that has been wrongfully done to them. There are also emotions that go hand in hand with forgiveness ... which should be addressed and vented and talked about. Are you saying that one should stuff those other emotions until one's head pops off? If a person is in a position to feel the need to forgive another person, depending on the severity of the violation, is it not true that the person who feels the need to forgive must have been angered or hurt or felt violated in the first place?
Are you saying here that you have such tolerance and forgiveness that you would allow bad behavior to continue until the individual causing the problem has crossed a line?i.e., by being a trouble maker/agitator? Or would you address the issue immediately. I am unclear as to what this means.
At some point and time, I feel that we must respect one anothers personal boundaries and realize that what upsets one may not upset another. We all have different levels at which we operate. One level is not the same for another ... what I'm hearing is that an assumption is being made regarding someones anger ... as was perceived by you, without asking more questions and gaining more insight as to this persons view of the world. Is this true? Or have I made an assumption here myself?
Do we all agree on everything? Absolutely not. Gathering facts, and asking questions first is always a good idea. It enhances understanding and brings forth truth.
I ate a little crow here myself when this topic originally surfaced. Why? Because I put my perceptions on the table with how I view the world and how I react and then I compounded that with listening to the other things being said. After revisiting the entire topic from start to finish, I realized that ... the gentleman in question, did in fact handle the matter in a professional manner. I listened to everyone else, and reacted when I posted myself, not the best avenue to go down I assure you. I didn't seek the truth or more facts to the situation.
I look forward to your response.
> Rebecca & Ken Aspinwall wrote:
> Scott,
>
>At the core of my being, this was a matter of courage. If somebody lights up in my office, I have the fortitude and the grace to handle the matter without going off the deep end.
>
>As to the girl, I would also handle it with courage. If I had first met her, I would tell her that her appearance would be distracting and would suggest another meeting with appropriate dress.
>
>People make mistakes. It might be my private domain [the office or whatever] and I might be the King, but where is the human compassion?
>
>I am a tolerant and peaceful man. Yes, I can be angry, too, but my anger only rises after a person proves to be an agitator or a trouble maker.
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>Honest mistakes are made. All need to be forgiven.
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>So, I stand by my original intuitions. They have long been trustworthy.
>
>Ken
>
>> Scott Stratten wrote:
>> Ken,
>>
>>"God did not appoint us to drive people away from the kingdom. We have to handle people in a redemptive manner. We have to do it the way God told us."
>>
>>There are a couple of popular Christian networks on Ryze that would love that thought. But telling ,e that I have to do something, according to anyone's god, is not proper, in my humble opinion. You have no idea what other people's beliefs are on here, Christian, Jewish, Agnostic, Athiest, etc...
>>
>>But saying someone was wrong to tell someone to take a hike from their office after they lit up was a joke. I'm not running a school of business etiquette, I'm running a business.
>>
>>Scott Private Reply to Sue T. (new win) |
