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| bloopers for all to laugh! | Views: 309 |
| Mar 28, 2009 4:04 am | | bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
padmanabhan ramasubban | | They're Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church ladies with typewriters. These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS) actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church services:
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The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
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The sermon this morning: 'Jesus Walks on the Water.' The sermon tonight: 'Searching for Jesus.'
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Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you.
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Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.
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Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again,' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
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For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
&n bsp;--------------------------
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.. Music will follow.
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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.
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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.
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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.
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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.
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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.
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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.
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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please use large double door at the side entrance.
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Private Reply to padmanabhan ramasubban |
| Mar 28, 2009 4:26 am | | re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Kanchana Ravichandran | | Thanks PR. Got a forward this morning and was wondering where to paste. This is most appropriate :)
A man who smelled like a distillery seat next to a priest. The man's tie
was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a half-empty
bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his
newspaper and began reading.
After a few minutes the disheveled guy turned to the priest and asked,
"Say, Father, what causes arthritis?"
"My son, it's caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too
much alcohol, and a contempt for your fellow man."
"Well, I'll be damned," the drunk muttered, returning to his paper.
The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man and apologized.
"I'm very sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. How long have you had
arthritis?"
"I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here that the Pope does."Private Reply to Kanchana Ravichandran |
| Mar 28, 2009 4:48 am | | re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
padmanabhan ramasubban | | Good !Trying to give people a humourous start on saturday morning!
Three cheers to all!!!!!!!Private Reply to padmanabhan ramasubban |
| Mar 28, 2009 5:17 am | | re: re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Bratzy | | hehe. cool. Private Reply to Bratzy |
| Mar 28, 2009 5:44 pm | | re: re: re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Charles Pradeep | | Super Cool!!
Nice ones PR; KR...
Cheers!
CP
Private Reply to Charles Pradeep |
| Mar 28, 2009 6:24 pm | | re: re: re: re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Lavanya Karalkar | | Thanks PR & KR..I am just wondering why GR has not shown his presence in this thread to make it more rhyming. Private Reply to Lavanya Karalkar |
| Mar 29, 2009 12:33 am | | bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
SOEB FATEHI | | i am not just wondering
Private Reply to SOEB FATEHI |
| Mar 29, 2009 2:52 am | | re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Kanchana Ravichandran | | R there jus the 3 of us!!! tooo bad - the 3rd is still missing... Private Reply to Kanchana Ravichandran |
| Mar 29, 2009 2:59 am | | re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
SOEB FATEHI | | not to worry the third will be revealed soon . . . Private Reply to SOEB FATEHI |
| Mar 29, 2009 4:01 am | | re: re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Kanchana Ravichandran | | can I hope for more??? Private Reply to Kanchana Ravichandran |
| Mar 29, 2009 4:23 am | | bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
SOEB FATEHI | |
pray! . . . .
. . . . rest assured!Private Reply to SOEB FATEHI |
| Mar 29, 2009 4:41 am | | re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Kanchana Ravichandran | | rest was there from start :) Private Reply to Kanchana Ravichandran |
| Mar 29, 2009 5:12 am | | re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
SOEB FATEHI | | singular? Private Reply to SOEB FATEHI |
| Mar 29, 2009 5:41 am | | re: re: re: bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
Kanchana Ravichandran | | always speak for myself ;) Private Reply to Kanchana Ravichandran |
| Mar 29, 2009 6:02 am | | bloopers for all to laugh! | # |
sujatha suresh | | 2 Good PR and KR.... some in the CHurch blopers are too good, like the one about "For those who have kids and don't know..." Hahahaha...
Im imagining the look on the Priests' face, after he heard that the pope was suffering with Arthritis....
SSPrivate Reply to sujatha suresh |
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