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| | Post New Topic | | How do you separate your work time from your Family Time? | Views: 588 | | Jul 16, 2005 6:13 pm | | How do you separate your work time from your Family Time? | # | 
Jay Bartels | | Hi everyone, If you've been to my Ryze page then you know i'm a single, stay at home father of 2 lovely girls (Faith, 11 and Elissa,7). My kids are not in camp so their home with me every day. I work full time from home and I have a hard time breaking away from my desk and often they want to go to the pool or ride bikes during the day. I love having them home , but I feel bad for not spending more time with them as I am a poor time manager. I'm curious to know how other parents do it. Thanks, Jay www.BocaBoyJay.com
Private Reply to Jay Bartels | | Jul 16, 2005 6:34 pm | | re: How do you separate your work time from your Family Time? | # | 
Monica Ricci | | Jay, welcome! Sometimes it's helpful to sit down and figure out what you'd like to be "work time" and then let the kids know that in advance.
It depends on what your business is though. If you can work literally ANY time of day, you have more flexibility. That way, you can schedule family time FIRST and then slot in work times around it.
If your work is more NON-negotiable in terms of when you can do things, then schedule your work time FIRST and schedule family time around that.
You can do it in advance (plan a week at a time perhaps) or you can do it day by day. I'd try to use each day for both kinds of activities though. This way, your girls aren't feeling ignored for an entire day (Unless of course, you take them somewhere to spend the whole day with someone else).
Another thing is to arrange play dates or activities with their friends, to give you a large chunk of uninterrupted work time. Whatever you do, put it on paper and post it where they can see it. Explain it to them so they know what to expect and when they can anticipate having your full attention versus when they will need to entertain themselves.
Your girls deserve their dad to be fully present when they are with you, so when you do take Family Time, really focus on being with them in the moment. Don't be preoccupied with work, take business phone calls or try to get reading done or whatever. Just be their dad. That's all they want. :)
Monica
Private Reply to Monica Ricci | | Jul 20, 2005 8:02 pm | | re: How do you separate your work time from your Family Time? | # |
KerryF | | Hi Jay,
My boys are both home for the summer as well. They are 12 and 13. I find it very difficult to maintain my level of work when summer hits.
My kids also want to go to the pool, the beach, the library, out to lunch, bike rides, etc, etc, etc.
What I do is I get busy on work as soon as I jump out of bed. I don't worry about my shower or getting ready first in the summer. Some days I might not get a shower until the evening. But at least I get some work done early in the am.
After they're awake I spend some time getting their schedules written up for the day.
Both of my kids have certain responsibilities they must do each day. They both have a musical instrument they must practice for no less than 1 hour. Both kids are starting their own businesses and must dedicate no less than 1 hour a day to running and progressing their business. They both must practice for their upcoming black belt test in TKD.
They are both writing a book as well. They are enjoying writing the books, but to be honest it was really just my way of giving them something else constructive during their summer time to keep them out of my hair so I can work more.
While they are tending to their own daily lists I work. When they are both done with their lists and come to me I usually break away from the work and go off to swim or such.
I never get as much work done in the summer time. If it's a problem, and work is falling behind, I do tend to stay up late some nights catching up. Or work weekends.
Taking Monica's advice about setting up playdates for the kids works very well. I like to have my own kids have friends over for sleepovers when I'm up to it...that way their parents OWE me a sleep over! Then when they leave for their sleep overs I work until I'm too tired to see.
Summers are tough for sure, Jay. What I remind myself is that they are short. This summer is going to be over before you know it. Sad isn't it??
Much luck to you. I know exactly what you are going through.
Kerry
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