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|All Change||Views: 742|
|Nov 01, 2007 7:35 am||All Change||#|
|Why is it that we humans have rearranged the natural ways to such an extent that we make things more difficult.|
In nature the old impart knowledge and guidance to the young. With humans nine times out of ten the young and old cannot even communicate, yes they talk, but are they communicating, there is a difference.
Many years ago families were a much tighter knit body and normally the son followed Dad into his occupation, and the daughters were taught the domestic things by Mum.
The young accepted the advice and knowledge without question and consequently could avoid a lot of the things that crop up while we are growing up. Of course there was still the exuberance of youth, and kids would rebel and do things that they regarded as research, to prove if Dad and Mum really knew that what they were saying was correct.
Whether that system was right or wrong, it did have structure and it generally produced young adults that could leave the nest and at least cope.
Because of the need for both parents, generally having to work flat out, just to standstill, it has fragmented the family group and structure that evolved over thousands of year.
Sitting down together as a family is becoming a rare event.
It was the family unit that taught our kids all sorts of things, in the best possible way, by example. I am not saying that life was perfect in those days, far from it, but it was more encompassing and everyone felt a bit more secure. It was the norm that Mum was at home when you got in from school.
As families needed more income to afford all the new appliances and labour saving devices, we saw the advent of the ‘latch key kid ‘ I distinctly remember putting my hand through the letterbox to get the key hanging on the ribbon inside.
I am in no way advocating a return to these [selective memory ] idyllic days, but I do think that we should accept things as they are, and try to find a way to communicate between the young and the old.
Things are changing at such a rate and it is no wonder that our kids are confused, it makes sense then to try and find some common ground, that we can all identify with, and use that as a foundation to try and really establish some lines of genuine communication.
Private Reply to croz
|Nov 01, 2007 9:08 am||re: All Change||#|
I have read over the past few years about the astounding number of parent(s) who have left the workforce and are now working from home, so I don't think "latch key" is necessarily the current issue.
The consciousness of women has evolved so much that I think daughters who learned only the domestic things would be quite unhappy in this day and age, and there are many men who have broken away from family businesses and expectations to do what they wanted to do. The more evolved parents have nurtured their children's talents and independence.
Your perspective relates to your own personal experiences, and I can respond from mine. Obviously, neither of us may be the norm or majority. I was not a latch key kid back then (we're probably from the same generation) but I look back and see that there was no communication with parents. And when I matured there was still no communication (mother was still alive) no matter what I attempted to do to create it.
So that leads me to believe that it is not necessarily about being close knit or a tight body. Or spending more time at the dinner table - although those things can have great value. The past may have seemed ideallic to some, but the fact is that many parents remained together because of commitment or because of the children or out of fear even though they may have been very unhappy. Commitment had more meaning in that era.
These days, kids in many ways are more advanced than their parents in knowledge, technology. I have never heard about so many juniors and seniors in high school creating businesses - many have already turned those businesses into six or seven figure operations by the time they graduate high school. Amazing. Funny, I'm not hearing too many kids who sound confused (you may have more exposure to this than I). But I bet some of the parents are :-)
I guess what I'm attempting to say here is that I don't believe it's about the circumstances so much as the awareness and the individuals - which is probably what you're saying also. Communication has to be two-way.
Different generations have different interests, different exposure, different histories. But love, respect, values - those are the common ground for communication no matter what the lifestyle circumstances.
A single parent can raise a child with more love, devotion, clarity and bonding than many "tighter knit bodies" who just go through the motions.
Anyway, those are some random thoughts to your interesting post.
Feel Free to Prosper
Private Reply to Marilyn Jenett